5.29.12

Got another rejection today.

I just don't understand why no one wants to hire me.

I hope to God it's not because my references are saying bad things about me.

I know there are others who are struggling to find jobs, but everything has always been so hard for me.

When is it my turn?

5.26.12

It's been a while since I made my last post, and honestly nothing has changed.  Oh, wait, that's not true.  I got rejected from another hospital, which was my #2 choice.  I have no clue to what I am doing wrong.  I wish when these people rejected me, they gave me a clear reason, that way I could fix what was wrong, if it's fixable.

So, I take the NCLEX on June 12.  After passing that I will officially be an RN.  Maybe an unemployed RN, but a RN all the same.

In personal news, things are stable at the moment.  And believe me, in my life, stable is good.

5.10.12

Last night I was pinned as an RN.  That doesn't really mean that  I am an RN yet, but I will be as soon as I pass the NCLEX-RN (which I have yet to pay for BTW).

I still haven't been offered a job.  I went on an interview today, and I honestly can't tell how it went.  I thought both of my other interviews went well, yet here I sit with no offers, so obviously I'm not a great judge.  There's nothing I can do now, but wait.  I don't even know where else to apply at this point.  It's a very frustrating feeling, especially since I really wanted to be one of the ones who had a job secured by pinning.  Oh well.  In my life, almost nothing has gone easy for me, so I don't expect this will, either.

I just want to tell the interviewers this: "No, I don't have any nursing experience, but I'm smart and I'm quick and I really care about people.  I am never late, I'm always prepared, and I'm calm under pressure.  I did in 2 years what it takes a lot of people 3 or 4 years, and I did it with a lot of unbelievable crap going on in my life. I relate to people well, because I understand hurt and loss more than a lot of people ever will. I don't like confrontation, and I don't always stand up for myself, but I never put myself first.  I will do what is right every time, even when it's not easy or not popular.  I am dedicated and loyal to the people I believe in, and especially to those who believe in me."

That's what I want people to know about me.

4.23.12

I finally broke down and called HR at MPMC to check on my application status.  And as I suspected, I am not being offered a position.  I am pretty disappointed because that was my first choice place, and a couple of pretty good friends got jobs there, but I have to believe that it's for a bigger reason.  There is something better out there for me.

I have applied to a few other places, so we'll have to see how it all comes out in the wash.

4.20.12

Another day of friends getting job offers and me getting nothing.  I had a pretty good pity party this afternoon, but nothing is over yet.  And at one hospital, my application status is still in consideration, so I'm not out there yet.

So that's today.

4.19.12

Today has been a pretty emotional day for me.

This morning we had a meeting with Robby and he turned over some evidence to us.  That was hard to go through, but we did.  And I'm left feeling sad and mad and discouraged and empowered all at the same time.

Then, I have been finding out all afternoon about various classmates getting job offers.  I didn't, so I'm discouraged about that.  But our mail is slow and I live in the middle of nothing, which is why our mail is slow.

I don't know what I am going to do if I don't get a job.  I'm already feeling pretty bummed about failing - FAILING!- a test this week.  I now have a 82.5 average, which is really too close to the cut-off for my comfort.  As long as I pass everything else, I'll be okay, but I am struggling so much this semester that I am worried about my downward trend.

I just want to graduate and pass the NCLEX-RN and get a job offer and get on with my life!